雅思考试6月写作高危话题范文分析-健康类

　　雅思考试6月写作高危话题范文分析-健康类 近几个月微博热度最高的词汇非“新冠肺炎”莫属了。而在抗击疫情的过程中，我们每个人都更加的注意个人卫生和健康。今天就带大家一起学习一篇“健康”话题的考官范文。

　　01

　　Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required.

　　Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. （C9T3）

　　题目翻译：有人认为改善公众健康最好的方法就是增加运动设施的数量。然而另一些人则认为这个方法收效甚微，改善公众健康需要其他方法。讨论双方观点并给出自己的看法。

　　题目分析：“the best way” 是雅思大作文题目里经常见到的一个词。虽然有很多题目都在问“某个方法是不是实现某个目标的最好方法”，但结论一定是否定的。因为要在短短的一篇议论文中，证明“最好”是不可能的。相反，给题目已知方法“挑毛病”并提出“更好的方法”才是这类题目一贯的写作套路。

　　02

　　A problem of modern societies is the declining level of health in the general population, with conflicting views on how to tackle this worrying trend. One possible solution is to provide more sports facilities to encourage a more active lifestyle.

　　范文分析：这个introduction仅仅对题目进行了完美的改写，而且剑桥官方范文中有很多篇文章的introduction中都不包含作者自己的态度。但是，在真正的考试中考官还是希望在文章一开头就能看到考生亮明自己的观点。所以这点就不建议同学们模仿了

　　如果想表明自己认为题目中的方法并不是“the best way”，可以仿照C8T3范文中的写法：Solving these problems is likely to need more than a simple rise in the price of petrol.

　　解决这些问题可能不仅需要单纯的提升油价。

　　我们把这句话中核心结构“Solving these problems/ this problem is likely to need more than …”提取出来，并套用到这篇文章里：

　　Solving this problem is likely to need more than a simple increase in the number of sports facilities. 这样就算一个明确的表态啦！

　　03

　　Advocates of this believe that today’s sedentary lifestyle and stressful working conditions mean that physical activity is no longer part of either our work or our leisure time. If there were easy-to-reach local sports centres, we would be more likely to make exercise a regular part of our lives, rather than just collapsing in front of a screen every evening. The variety of sports that could be offered would cater for all ages, levels of fitness and interests; those with painful memories of PE at school might be happier in the swimming pool than on the football pitch.

　　范文分析：虽然题目已知方法并不是“the best way”，但也并非一无是处。同学们在写作时不要上来就挑毛病。相反，先承认题目已知方法的作用，随后挑毛病，这样不仅增加文章的长度更能体现辩证思维，是获得高分的重要手段。

　　语言方面，范文中并没有特别生僻晦涩的词汇。不过一些地道的表达，比如“sedentary lifestyle”, “easy-to-reach”，“make exercise a regular part of our lives”和“collapsing in front of a screen”是非常值得积累下来的。另外，并列结构，比如“a and b”, “a, b and c”， “either …or…” 等也是考官范文中常见的语法结构。同学们在平时练习中也要多加使用。

　　04

　　However, there may be better ways of tackling this problem. Interest in sport is not universal, and additional facilities might simply attract the already fit, not those who most need them. Physical activity could be encouraged relatively cheaply, for example by installing exercise equipment in parks, as my local council has done. This has the added benefit that parents and children often use them together just for fun, which develops a positive attitude to exercise at an early age.

　　范文分析：终于开始挑毛病了：专业的运动场所只能吸引对运动有兴趣的人，而不是真正需要运动的人！这是不是极像办了健身房年卡，但是打卡次数两只手就能数过来的你我。

　　另外，国外的健身房的确不便宜，因为除了每月要扣钱之外，会员还要缴纳一笔不小的入会费。如果因为搬家而不能继续在这个运动中心锻炼的话，这笔钱是不会退的。所以文章才会提出“Physical activity could be encouraged relatively cheaply”的办法。对于收入不高的人群来说，这些专业的运动设施还真是挺奢侈的，不如绕着家附近的公园散步遛狗。

　　注意，当提出新的办法时，考官范文中往往使用被动语态结构。

　　Sth should be done或者 Sth should be more…

　　05

　　As well as physical activity, high tax penalties could be imposed on high-fat food products, tobacco and alcohol, as excessive consumption of any of these contributes to poor health. Even improving public transport would help: it takes longer to walk to the bus stop than to the car.

　　范文分析：除了“迈开腿”，“管住嘴”也是很必要的。征收脂肪税，酒精和烟草也是赋税很重的商品。商家就不得不提价售卖，进而减少人们在此类产品的花销。

　　有些经验丰富的同学可能会问：为啥这篇范文的主体段有3段，我以前见到的都是2段的呀。写作考试其实没有强制性的分段要求，只要分段合理，保证每个段落中心明确就可以了。而且分段仅仅影响“连贯与衔接”的分数，只要这一项不求8分，大家可以随便分。毕竟还有一篇分了10段的考生范文（C7T2）得了7.5的高分

　　06

　　In my opinion, focusing on sports facilities is too narrow an approach and would not have the desired results. People should be encouraged not only to be more physically active but also to adopt a healthier lifestyle in general.

　　范文分析：又是一个简练的conclusion：吐槽题目已知方法加总结新方法。但是第一句的句型非常值得学习，可以用来吐槽任何不靠谱的方法：

　　…is too narrow an approach and would not have the desired results.

　　以上就是小编为大家整理的关于健康篇的6月高危话题，还不赶快码起来！环球教育雅思写作辅导，帮助更多考生突破写作万年5，有兴趣可咨询网站客服